Who the Fuck is Alice?

Firstly, the good stuff. The British voice talent is class. Stephen Fry is pitch perfect as the Cheshire cat and Alan Rickman voices a caterpillar whose name escapes me. Tweedledum and Tweedledee are a highlight reel on their own (Matt Lucas) but the hare steals the show and is worth the entrance ticket alone.  (Voiced by Paul Whitehouse of Fast Show fame)

It really is a treat for the eyes as wonderland is seen to be bright, vibrant and colourful as well as a dark and derelict place. The 3D is spectacular, though not as breathtaking as Avatar, and is the main good point about this film. The story is not great but it really doesn’t matter when there is such eye candy on show.

I never thought I would say this, but Johnny Depp is starting to look a bit of a one trick pony, as is Tim Burton. However, at least Burtons trick is good.
 I think that this would be a good time to break the holy trinity of Burton, Depp and Carter as the formula seems tired at best. Sweeney Todd was average and Willy Wonka didn’t even measure up to Gene Wilder standard. I was hoping for better with Alice.

As soon as Depp’s mad hatter appears on screen it feels a bit same old. It also reeks of good old-fashioned Hollywood nepotism. I bet Burton didn’t even audition other actors for the part of hatter when there would have been others that would have brought more to the role than Depp doing his Willy Wonka impression. I would have given the role to Jim Carey.

 Don’t get me wrong; Depp is a fine actor (Public Enemies, Pirates of the Caribbean) but his gothic, dark madman act is wearing thin.

Carter almost ruins the film as the Red Queen. She is awful and it seems her husband is to under-the-thumb to direct her properly. There is a scene at the end of the film involving Carter (I wont ruin it) that reminded me of what I picture Burtons and Carters relationship to be like.

The other disappointment was Alice herself, I am glad they chose an unknown actor for the role as it makes it easier to suspend disbelief. However they should have found a better unknown than a female Keanu Reeves. Wooden.

If you get a chance to see this beauty at the cinema do it. Just don’t expect your heart and mind to be as engaged as your bespectacled eyes.